Hi guys!
I know I've disappeared from this blog for about two months, but this second semester has been crazy busy for me. I guess that's what I get for taking 20 hours of coursework. Anyways, I have two weeks before my final exams and then after that my freshman year of college is over. I know people always say, "Woah, time just flew by!" but for me it really did happen. My parents kept telling me that life will "speed up" now and I always thought, "Pshhh, no it hasn't this past week felt like a month long" but in actuality they were right (I guess that's kinda their right being my parents and all). But what I had initially thought wasn't wrong. Some of the weeks where it seemed like there just wasn't enough time in a day to get everything done, passed in what felt like the duration of a month. I remember distinctly my first week back after fall break was the longest week of my life. I was sitting with some of my friends in the dining hall on a Wednesday, and saying, "Can you believe fall break was just last week"? I mean honestly, it was just so crazy. But those are college kid problems.
You know thinking about how this school year is almost over, and trying to figure out what to do this summer and next year as well, I couldn't help but think about my future. My friends are all finding crazy things to do independently during the summer; they are acting like true adults. And I know that I am an adult, or at least my age reflects it, but I still love to go home and see my parents, have my mom do my laundry, and eat the food that they buy and cook for me. At this moment it freaks me out to think that I won't be able to relish in these luxuries in the next (at max) 3 years. My roommate got an internship for the better part of her summer, and she's trying to find a room to rent to live in because the internship isn't exactly in driving distance from her house. She literally has to live independently as an adult going to work for about two months, and we're just freshmen in college. It literally blows my mind and kinda scares me.
This week has been crazy for me, but now that I've finished everything for this week I had a lot of time to just chill and watch some shows online. One of which was Gilmore Girls, a show that never fails to make me happy. I have just finished the series finale, where Rory after thinking that she has not job prospects for the summer or future gets a job offer and has to leave in three days. She has almost no time to get everything prepared and say goodbye to her family, friends, and town. Just all the talk on the show about having no time and not being sure when she will see everyone again no doubt freaked me out and made me reflect on my life and my next steps. I know I want to be a doctor, I feel like that's what I have been called to do and I love all the science and just awesome things that can result from being a doctor, medical and otherwise, but all the work and things I'd have to go through to get me there scares me. It doesn't make me second guess my job choice in any way but just thinking about classes for next year, the MCAT, going to medical school, finding a residency and then eventually being an established doctor is a little daunting. I'm getting close to the age where I have to pay my own bills, buy and cook my own food, do everything for myself by myself because I can't live at home for the rest of my life. It's just a lot to take in and I'm ready for the challenge and change, but you can't just help to stop, reflect, and go "Woah!"
Sorry guys, I didn't mean for this post to be so heavy and a little freaked out, but this was something I've been thinking about a lot this past week. Are/were you guys scared about your future or are/were you ready to just take the next step? I hope to be writing another post within the near future because I have a lot of things that I want to reflect on, but we'll see how my schedule pans out within the next few weeks.
Bye!
